ke-MELAYU-an

1. Beragama Islam.

2.Bertutur Bahasa Melayu.

3. Mengamalkan Adat Melayu.

Cebisan Dari Hati

Ke sembahyang raya pastilah bukan,

Hatiku berat perlu ke kelas,

Selamat beraya aku ucapkan,

Kepada semua, jujur dan ikhlas.

Craving for Orgasm

Ini hasil dua tahun di KMB.

But I bet my shoes now will still look brand new after the 5 years stint here.

I need more sports orgasm.

Cerita Kedai Kopi London

Wenger: Hard luck fergie. Alaa biasa la, referee memang camtu. Dulu kau seronok, kali ni dia kenakan kau balik.

Ferguson: Senyap la kau wenger. Aku tuang teh tarik kat kau nanti. Taula team tengah on form, berlagak pulak.

Ancelotti: *senyum sinis. Eh Benitez, senyap semacam je. Main blackberry je kerja kau. Tengah rasuah fiorentina ka?

Benitez: Kepala hotak kau. Aku tengah fikir macam mana nak lepas champs league ni. Entah apa hal magical touch aku tak menjadi.

Ferguson: Bodoh la kau Benitez. Aku suroh beli Villa kau tak nak. Kau gi beli Aquilani buat apa. Treatment room kau kosong sangat ke?

Benitez: Kurang ajar. Taula kau tak ada injury season ini. Tak apa, kau tengok nanti. Alaa wenger, jangan tak terasa pulak. Nanti kejap lagi, Fabregas and Rosisky injured balik la tu.

Wenger: Eh babi. Aku pulak kena. Aku tergelak tengok wallet Ferguson ada gambar Cristiano Ronaldo lagi. Rindu ke bang?

Ferguson: Kepala hotak kau. Aku nak buang la ni. Alah, atleast Cristiano Ronaldo hensem. Ini pergi simpan gambar Drogba apa barang? Lotti lotti.

Ancelotti: Aku pulak kena. Dia on form kut, aku sayang benar kat dia. Tapi kau jangan lupa bang, aku nak Pato haritu, Milan tak nak jual. Kalau dapat Pato, memang gambar dia penuh kat wallet aku ni.

Benitez: Kau pasal Pato, kau cakap slow-slow sikit bai. Wenger asik pasang telinga je tu. Dia naik berahi sikit dengar player-player muda ni. HA HA.

Wenger: Aku pulak kena. Kau mulut jaga baik Benitez. Hari tu kata nak pinjam player aku? Aku tak bagi kang.

Benitez: Oh haah la. Nanti bak mai aku pinjam Bendtner dengan Merida. Boleh pulak Torres and Gerrard buat hal sekarang. Rasa nak sepak je dua ekor tu.

Ferguson: Kau tak nak pinjam Nani aku ke? Aku bagi free je.

Ancelotti: Itu kau bagi Portsmouth pun dia tak nak. Okla aku chow dulu. Tak biasa la teh tarik UK ni. Teh Tarik Italy jauh lagi sedap.

Wenger: Banyakla kau. Perancis nya jauh paling sedap bang. Anyway, next time lepak ajak Mark Hughes sekali.

Ferguson: Tak dapat la bai. Dia mana layan teh tarik. Dia sekarang layan shisha ngan pak arab je.

Benitez: Ok chow. Aku nak pergi buat CV untuk mintak kerja kelab lain.

Wenger: Chow

Finally beaten

You know this feeling when you thought nobody in this world can beat your manipulation, but somehow, there is?

ok fine, lets try this. Have you feel this feeling, when you never thought you will find a person like that, then tiba-tiba jumpa?

Fine la, one more question. Have you find a girl that you don't feel stupid or embarrassed to blog about?

Like I said, It is a brand new feeling.

Sex party.

it was hot and sexy. at nottingham.

No sentence will do justice in explaining how excited I was for the party. I couldnt focus in class, always daydreaming, staging up what will be happening there.

But macho konon, mana boleh cerita kat orang kau excited.

So Saturday came. We woke up at 4.30, merely 3 hours sleep. Oh yea did I not tell you. The whole team slept late the night before, discussing tactics on the table of foosball. So it was a sleepy journey towards the bus. I wasnt talking much. People presumption it is because the

lack of sleep, but only I know the real reason.

I'm feeling generous. I'll tell you. I was nervous.

In a blink of eyes, the party has ended.

Nervousness. Excitement. Horniness. All replaced with satisfaction.

Thank you Zulfadli hafiz ismail, Zulkifli Ismail, Afif ashari, Vivek, Faiq Syamim, Acap, dan Ahmad Redzuan for an awesome day of sex. What a way to start my gigolo career in UK.

Special thanks to Izham Ismail dan Haziq Bani for the support and advise. Liverpool jom am.

If every sex is a fling, this is my best fling so far.

p/s: we were among the top 8. If you understand that.

Its a brand new feeling

even one whole blog cannot explain it.

Lovely.

Pakcik Majin

It was a surprised to many that I just turned 19. And that includes me myself.

Thank you for all the birthday wishes. Tak kisah la blogpost, facebook, texts, sms, bb messenger or direct wish.. Its the thought that matters.

Card of Swans at hyde park made my day

Oh yea, say thank you to fb for me.

Resolusi diri,

''I'll do whatever things I plan to do, without anymore excuse, without anymore delays''

Btw people, have a nice year ahead.

Jauh di mata, dekat di hati.

Orang kata. Maka aku anggap, dekat di mata, jauh di hati.

Not that I ever confess myself as the deviant supporter of you, Mr Arsenal. But still, I feel guilty that I have not get the chance to watch any of your games, whether on tv or atleast by gamecast. Kat emirates tu lagi la. The guilt is worse than missing classes.

Our love is no more that sweet. I'll make it up to you. But for the time being, I can only wish you goodluck. And yeah, congratulations too, you've been playing that beautiful football of yours and winning matches at the same. All those matches I've been missing.

Maybe thats the reason I've been missing your games. I might bring bad luck.

Or mungkin sebab ada orang ketiga. Ha ha.

No worries, good love does preservere.

Ohana Kaizen

All I wanted is to see the 'quite thin' me again, but what I got was way meaningful.

''but anytime you need a friend, I will just be me''

I'll pray for your success, wherever you are, whatever you are doing.

amin

Cultural shock.

Bukan aku nak sangat nampak cool dan tidak cultural shock.

Aku memang tak.

Raya dengan keluarga memang tak boleh lawan. Tapi kalau tiga dapur semua penuh masakan melayu, apa sangat yang buat kau rindu raya Malaysia. Hand phone ada nak bermaaf-maafan dengan ibubapa tercinta. Tapi kalau haritu ada mercun sebatang dua, memang raya tahun depan aku tak balik Malaysia

Oxford street tu, Malaysia pun ada. Cuma pelajar kat Malaysia tak dapat duit cukup banyak nak shopping almost every week. Memangla pilihan barang kat Malaysia tak sebanyak macam oxford street, tapi ada kau jumpa kedai jual baju melayu kat London ni?

Mungkin main bola kat Malaysia kau tak cramp sebelum start main, tapi yang pasti habis main, kau akan kena basuh baju. Kat UK, nak basuh apa kalau peluh setitik pun susah nak rasa.

Jangan assume kawan. Aku still basuh baju.

Cultural shock? Itu alasan bila kau dah fail nanti. Aku harap aku tak perlu guna alasan itu.

Bila tengok 'Ankle' kanan besar bengkak biru, aku rasa macam aku masih kat Malaysia. Susah pulak nak gi tandas bagi keluar sambal petai cik Izham Ismail bawak semalam.

Kawan, semua lebih kurang sahaja. Apa sangat yang buat kau benci Malaysia?

Hujan Batu

'Hujan emas di negara orang, Hujan batu di negara sendiri.'

Aku kini berhujan emas. Tapi kau pun tahu, aku ke sini nak bawak emas pulang ke negara berhujan batu.

Kalaulah kau cukup pandai untuk faham maksud aku.

Amin.

Selamat Tinggal

'Dear friends, foes and neutrals alike. I will be off to London, United Kingdom on Wednesday, 16th August 10a.m. Goodluck in your future undertakings and you are welcome to pray for mine as well. Take care and adios.

Too many things to say, but too little that comes out. I hope those sums up everything pretty well.

Selamat tinggal. Malaysia, Keluarga, Rakan, Musuh, dan mee goreng bistro melaka. See you next year.

Misi Mustahil

'Tolong carikan aku awek czech tau.'

Aku tau diorang takkan cari, tapi aku tetap kawan dengan diorang.

Itulah kawan.

Selamat jalan.

Kumar And Clark go to Bukit Baru

with transit at Ampang, Kuala Lumpur.

They started of their journey with their friends, Marieb and Hoenhn, from a dusty yet very crowded market somewhere in Malaysia. Their caretaker let them go, though with a very high price to pay.

A price for their freedom. Which includes one large white coat, in case they'll need it during rainy seasons. We are reaching December don't you remember.

And yeah their caretaker's name is KAMAL. A very rich, yet humble foreigner, very opportunist.

So they made their way to KLCC, to see how tall is the then tallest building in the world. And they are out of words. They were impressed. They also took time wandering around and met some new friends, a very tiny rice cooker named Panasonic and a water proof shoes named Pedro.

Pedro laughed at their white coat. He knows its not water proof. Cunning KAMAL.

So they all made their way to the transit point, Chorus hotel, Ampang. which where they overheard a very serious yet loving conversation between a mother and a son.

' Ingat tujuan apa u pergi sana. Tak ada masalah nak enjoy sekali sekala, tapi ingat your 'bearing' Jangan hanyut. Ibubaba tau u boleh berjaya.

'We love you'.

And they made their way to Bukit Baru the next morning with new purpose. To try their best to help the son to complete his 'tujuan'.

Ps: But Kumar and Clark may have to go back and meet their caretaker. They need an upgrade. They wanna be Seventh, not the sixth edition.

Aku Berlagak

Ok fine, aku type post ini sekarang sebab aku nak berlagak aku bangun sahur.

Aku pun nak berlagak yang aku tak tidur-tidur tunggu subuh.

Oh haah aku tak tinggal puasa lagi kali ini.

Semalam, aku pergi tarawikh. Dan kelmarin juga. Senang cerita, aku nak berlagak yang aku tak miss tarawikh lagi.

Alaa apa guna aku berlagak. Orang buat benda ni tiap-tiap tahun. Tapi apa salahnya nak berubah kan, jom?

Baiklah aku tak nak berlagak lagi. So besok malam lepas buka aku terus sambung tidur.

Selamat Berpuasa weyh. Jangan berlagak.

Precautionary Measures (H1N1)

In normal time, putting your hands inside your pockets is an act of cowardness.

When people are dying each day to a devastating pandemic, it is an act of precautions. The one that helped us contained the very virulent virus.

Prayers for all those who are infected by this virus, and may you survive and be a better person.

And yeah, prayers to all human being. May we survive this scare, and build a more peaceful world.

amin.

I confess: New Love Story

Let it begin tonight, my love.

You'll fill my weekends for the next 10 months. When no more calls for Maple reunion.

May our love be bless, no tough hurdles, no foolish drama.

Unconditional love, again.

Friend's Birthday

For me, birthday is one holy event. If you were given the chance to go through this beautiful world of ours on that day, its not overrated to celebrate it atleast once a year.

So big kick at my ass because I need facebook to remind me of the birthday of some of my close friends.

So now, big vow. As long as you're contactable by phone, I will use it to atleast send a birthday message to my close friends. Blame my conventional thinking, I hugely overate text message compared to the wall post.

Same initial FB doesnt necessarily means I must need facebook to honour my friend's birthday.

Oh yea, Happy birthday ale. Again.

High School Buddies.

Me: So result ok right. See you in London ka?

Friend: Yes darling. Its a date.

***********

I'VE been looking forward for A-level result to be out, more that the devil-blues clash. The boring, expected game for one reason, the second is because its lovely to have friends from high school in UK for the next few years.

Congrats guys and girls, may the next few years be more awesome.

and those aussie people ready weyh nanti aku datang visit.

p/s: Yeah the third reason is your own team is not in the final I guess. And Arsengal doesnt even want to buy new players for god's sake.

Ok enough of football, save it for next time. I'll round up the exciting windows, from my own perspective. Which I have nothing to say, except Vermalean.